“Be a sponge, not a stone” and 6 other tips for communicating across cultures

If you ever you get the chance to speak to students at the Preparing Global Leaders Institute (PGLI) course, snap it up.  Few weeks ago I was back in Struga, on the shores of Lake Ohrid in Macedonia’s sun-blessed south, to do just that.  Actually, any opportunity to speak with a group of students is usually rewarding; but this bunch made for a really bracing experience. The students – 40 of them from 32 different countries in six different continents – were an impressive bunch.  Asked to speak about the life of a diplomat, I chose to focus on communicating across cultures.

Years ago, the group of those who needed to understand other cultures to do their jobs successfully was relatively small.  Diplomats were certainly in it; so were a few others like international business people and journalists.  With globalisation, especially through trade and travel, that group has grown.  But while globalisation has exposed all of us to other cultures more often, more widely and more deeply than ever before, it has also made much more complex the challenge of communicating with people from other cultures.

One of London’s proud claims is that pupils in its primary schools speak over 330 different mother tongues.  It is no longer just diplomats or international business people who need to understand those differences.  London-based teachers, policemen, doctors, and many others do too.  And it’s not just London. Sao Paolo is a Brazilian city, right?  Yes, except that over a million of its citizens originate from Japan.  Communities around the world are similarly diverse – Hong Kong, USA, Singapore, France, Australia…

In my talk to the PGLI students I boiled my thoughts down to seven tips:

1. Be open and curious. Be a sponge, not a stone.  Comes naturally to some; others (me included) have to work at it.
2. Don’t fall for stereotypes. They are often based on reality, but an incomplete part of it.  They are often amusing and seductive.  But don’t be taken in.  Dig deeper.
3. Know that you will never change a culture; however illogical behaviour might seem to you. Those who know the Balkans know the concept of inat, an approach that takes us to the outer reaches of obstinacy.  You won’t change it; you have to work with it.
4. Be honest and transparent.
5. There are some universal values. Everyone responds to kindness or consideration.  And anywhere you lose your temper, you lose the argument.
6. Don’t overlook the (apparently) small details. Many East Asians respond positively if you use both hands in offering and receiving business cards.  Never skim it across the table cowboy-style.
7. And in communication, above all be imaginative. Approaches that get messages across in Western Europe aren’t guaranteed to do the business elsewhere.

And last but not least, enjoy the communications across cultures; it can’t be good or bad, just different.

Charles Garrett, British Ambassador to Macedonia