Some ‘Do’s’ and ‘Don’ts’ of Diplomatic Etiquette

Tidying out an Embassy cupboard recently, a colleague found a booklet that I first read when I joined the Diplomatic Service in 1986. Even then the 1965 Guidance to Diplomatic Service Officers and Wives posted to Diplomatic Missions Overseas seemed quaint and outdated. Looking at it now some of the advice seems better suited to a television producer staging a period drama.

For example:

Calling cards: ‘a married women must never leave a card on a man’

How to seat dinner guests: ‘If you place official guests wrongly they may protest officially the next day, or even leave your house after the soup.’

Dress: ‘In England a women is never formally dressed for daytime functions outside her own home unless she is wearing a hat and gloves…women officers would be well advised to keep a hat and glove in the office for such emergencies.’

In 1965 of course there was no advice on tools of modern diplomacy such as mobile phones, websites and other digital media. And some cultural changes of the past 40 years stand out. The authors do not, for example, contemplate the possibility that British diplomats might have husbands or partners rather than wives.

But some of the practical advice still holds good. For example we are still reminded to arrive at a new post with a large supply of passport photos and a black tie or equivalent. And other common sense remarks, delivered with characteristic good humour, still hold good.

Humour: ‘Beware the temptations of wit and the dangers of humour. Failures in this line can lead to misunderstandings ……’

Dress: ‘When deciding what to wear on an ordinary day remember that it may bring unexpected demands.’

Public speaking: ‘Do not speak for too long. Try not to use a text … Your audience is more likely to stay awake.’‘

And one that might have been written for diplomatic bloggers:

Members of the British Diplomatic Service ……. need to take extra care, as if they put their foot in it the responsibility will be theirs alone.

And one final quote: ‘There will be times when you are tied to your desk seven days a week until all hours. [But] If your ‘In’ tray and your conscience are clear, ask your superior if you can visit a café, go to a local art show or just play a round of golf.’

Those were the days!