“I didn’t realise the harm I was doing by abandoning and ignoring these young mothers, now I know. I want to help these girls. I will start today”
One in three women worldwide have experienced physical or sexual violence – mostly by an intimate partner. One in three. This statistic shocks and saddens me every time I read it. I think of my friends, my family, the women I work with, and I am appalled at the thought of them being treated this way.
Last week, on 25 November, was the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women.
Working in the Democratic Republic of Congo this is a pertinent issue:
• UNHCR North Kivu monitoring teams registered 705 cases of sexual violence in the region between January – July 2013, including 619 cases of rape. During the same period in 2012, 108 cases were registered. The survivors of sexual and gender-based violence (SGBV) included 288 minors and 43 men.
• Most cases of sexual violence are committed by armed men. Out of the 705 cases of sexual violence reported to UNHCR, 434 were perpetrated by armed elements.
• Official UN figures show that recorded cases of sexual violence in North Kivu soared from 4,689 cases in 2011 to 7,075 in 2012. Many more cases remain unreported.
As part of the 16 Days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence Campaign, I visited a community in North Kivu, DRC where I met with women who have almost all experienced physical or sexual violence. Their community has been caught in the crossfire of recurrent conflicts and the prevalence of SGBV is high here. The conflict is responsible for breaking up communities and families, and exacerbating the cultural and gender norms which are at the root of sexual violence in all societies.
Sitting in a circle with these women under a corrugated iron roof in the middle of their village, we talked about education, their desire to learn, and their desire for their children to learn. We were joined by religious and community leaders who contributed to the conversation, sharing their ideas and debating pre-conceived perceptions.
The plight of young girls forced out of education due to pregnancy as a result of rape dominated the conversation. Abandoned by their families, and with no means to support themselves or the child they are known as “bisagara” or ‘rejects’ in this community. Devoid of social standing and marginalised by their own families, these girls cannot access education or work, or receive support in looking after their unexpected and unwanted child.
Students from the local school were present and one young woman spoke up “if it were me, and I was abandoned by my family, I would have no choice but to leave school”. With no option but to abandon their studies, these young women are left vulnerable and alone.
The purpose of these community conversations is to promote awareness about these issues and also to find solutions together. “We must educate our boys and girls so that this doesn’t happen. We abandon the girl, but the boy is not innocent in this either. If we are promoting education for all, we need to work with both” declared Pastor Simon Munyembaza.
The men are challenging their peers to think and act differently. Pastor Jangwa shared an example “Men are now willing to change. When we teach them about sexual violence [in the church] we give them examples. As fathers they can understand the hurt that can be caused. As a father myself I speak openly about this with my own boys and girls. I don’t want to see it happen to them”.
“We are all responsible for change, and change must start with each one of us” said Jaqueline Muhawe, challenging the community to respond. Almost immediately Savarine Mujawimana, one of the community members stood up and announced “I didn’t realise the harm I was doing by abandoning and ignoring these young mothers, now I know. I want to help these girls. I will start today”.
Slowly but surely the situation is beginning to change in these communities. Men and women are working together to break the taboo around sexual violence, and are already seeing results. Not one case of sexual violence has been reported in the last month in this community.
This conversation was part of an initiative working with communities to tackle the root causes of sexual violence. Tearfund is working with faith leaders and communities to prevent sexual violence and assist survivors in the DRC and elsewhere in the world. This includes tackling harmful social norms, which are the root cause of so much violence and stigma. Our work in the DRC shows that change is possible, and by breaking the silence on this issue, we can help survivors access the services, care and support they need.